the trials and tribulations of me!

well hey there

2005-07-28T22:32:00.000-07:00

Oh Life,
it's interesing isn't it. Right now I'm pretty content. My life is going pretty well. I mean it's pretty much, work, running, helping out my family, running, and hanging out with my AMAZING friends. Last time I wrote in here was on my birthday, damn that was a fun night. My girls ( plus Mike and Jimmy) took me out to Bahama Breeze, where I've never gone before and we had SUCH a nice meal. I got SUCH nice gifts too, way more than I deserve. Being at the beach was a nice start too.
I can't wait to hang out with Justine tomrrow. We're going to Slaw Slam I think and I'm gonna be PUMPED, if we get in. Plus it's Justine we always have fun.
Mary Evelyn is doing pretty well right now. She's almost as big as we need her to be, which is VERY good. Hopefully she'll have her surgery and get better. She's totally cute.
I can't believe schools not very far off. I really want my schedule!
I miss Ben and I don't like that he's at that boys scout thing, it sounds dangerous.
I HEART OTB!
Alright, gg. -Bernie

BEST BIRTHDAY EVER

2005-07-15T22:14:00.000-07:00

Thanks for giving me the bestest birthday! I LOVE MY GIRLS! I still can't believe how much you did for me, like the presents dinner, the CARD the HARRY POTTER PARTY! haha
i love you all soooo soooooo much. I have to got to bed bc o wait 50 mile run tomorrow?!? haha i love you guys. nit!

mundane much?

2005-07-10T21:04:00.000-07:00

have you ever thought about how you're life seems so intersting to you, but it's really not all that interesting?I mean like mine for example stuff happens and i'm like sweet! but yeah then i realize it's not all that cool. working running and hanging out pretty much = my life as of now. i like it think it's interesting but probobly no one else does. oh well.

what up?

2005-07-07T16:26:00.000-07:00

Alright, so we're in our 5th week of summer everyone, soak it up! I'm doing OK, today has been a little slow and I've been feeling in a sort of depressing mood, I dunno why. I actually took a nap today, which was weird, since I NEVER take naps... ever. I've been really lazy today.
Well, it's my parent's 15th wedding anniversery, so congratulaions to them! They're out right now, pbrobobly trying to call and not getting through because we have dialup internet, ha ha. Oh well they should be enjoying they're meal anyway, they need a break. My parnets are really great actually. I know I sound like a dork, but I mean it.
well gg. fredy's here.

highlights

2005-06-18T21:07:00.000-07:00

ok - highlights of my summer thus far, in order:

1. Becca's graduation party
2. Caitlin's birthday party
- nightime capture the flag!
3.Bond Park Track party
4. Scott and Shelia's house for lunch
5. Summer Practice with my favorite people in the world
6. Auditions for Alice and Wonderland w/ Sara
7. Mean Girls w/ NIck and Ben and Sara
8. Crashing turner farms pool with Sara and Mel
9. Working at Outback
- hottest coworkers haha
-my sweet fellow hostesses
-fooooood
-$$$
10. Not failing any classes, and no D's
11. Ashley Murr quality time
12. MODEST MOUSE
-getting to see all my seniors i miss!!
- Tony, Rob, Dennis,Stewert
-Rock on w/ Mel
- Sara, Lauren,Jenny, Amanda, and Caitlin!
- SO GOOD LIVE!!!
13. Sleepover after MOdest MOuse
14. Spending theday w/ Mel
15. Greensboro
-nose bleed
-HBO at 1 am ( nuff said)
-ghetto hot tub
- sweet men hitting on me in the car on the way there
-biscuitville, hams
- " that looks like the female reproducitve system."
"baby, that's gross"
-no free stuff??
16. Bethany quality time

summertime

2005-06-08T20:41:00.000-07:00

it's finally summer and i couldn't be happier. i've been running this week, which is fun, every morning at 7:45. i'm actually not lying, i do like it , i get to see everyone i love, and some people i hate, well actually really just one. ha ha. tonite was my frist nite working at outback, which was really fun. the nicest people in the world work there, no lie. i enjoyed it, even though my feet KILL. working is roough on the feet. plus i have to ride my bike to wkr and i have to run every morning at 7:45, so uh i'm getting my exercise. other than that, just chilling with the important peoople in my life, family and my bestest friends. uh that's about it. - Bernadette

whew

2005-05-21T18:52:00.000-07:00

wow, i have to say that in the past month, i have been through more shit than ever before in my life, and i don't say that in a feel bad for me kinda way, i mean it's simply it's the truth. To summarize, i had the worst track season of my life, when it was the most important year for running, yeah we had states last weekend, which was a total bust for me, although we did win it as a team.... i still scored some points rather pathetically. i really have nothing to blame it on, i think at that point i was just so physically and mentally exhausted from everything, i just didn't have anything left, which is bad i know, but it's all over now.
so first off is track, secondly is everything with mary evelyn. right now she's home and just slowly gaining weight and getting ready to have surgery. my parents have a meeting with the cardiologist on June 14th and that's when we find out when the surgery will be. it's probobly going to be towards the end of the summer. But, until then we don't know what our summer holds. we don't know if we'll be able to travel or anything. we were supposed to go to NY but everything in life has been put on hold. so far for this summer, these are the plans: 1. XC camp w/ my girls!! 2. Journalsim camp at UNC, don't hate it's really cool. 3. Jason's lake house w/ Mel... most def happening soon 4. Topsail island- CFL reunion Kathryn? 5. trips to d-town to see all those ppl. That's all the plans for now, we'll see what else develops
Next up is drama with boy (s) and friends, i guess i probobly would be safe writing about it on here sine NO ONE reads this shit, but i'm not into putting everything out there for everyone to read... so yeah sorry just know there was drama.
Then there are grades, holy shit, i have a D in Mrs. Brown's class... wow, that's pathetic i know, i'm praying it goes up with ALL the extra credit i have,and i'm thinking it will, but my grades are suffering.

OK so that's my life, but things are starting to settle, Finally and I have to say througout all of this there's one thing that has kept me sane, love from the people I care about most.... My family and my friends are what keeps me alive, when I am at the END of my line, and I would not have survived this past month without them, everyone who's been there fore me I have to just say THANK YOU right now, for everything, your sacrifices, your listening to me complain, your kindness, i love you all so much.
I'm gonna go but I can't wait til summer, it's fast approaching, only exams and SAT's left until freedom. wish me luck. LOVE, BERNADETTE

in journalism...

2005-05-10T10:45:00.000-07:00

Ok so where do I start?
Last week was insanely CRAZY. Probobly the most crazy week of my life. My Mom and newest sister, Mary Evelyn, just got home from the hospital on Sunday. Evelyn still has to go back for open heart surgery in a few months, so keep her in your prayers. Then on Friday I had PROM. Holla. ha ha. Prom was actually so much fun- Sean was a good date, such a gentleman. And I just love all my XC girls. Even with ALL the drama, it was still a really good time.
As for now, I missed school last week because of my mom and stuff and I'm Soooo behind. I have a billion tests to make up, whatever. I don't care anymore... GAH.
Well i have states next weekend. Wish me luck, I'm scared! Anyway, I'm getting bored w/ this, so more later I guess.
Peace,
Bernadette

2005-05-03T09:43:00.000-07:00

I laid on the floor and my hand swalloed his as he clung to me for comfort. Right now everything is pretty unsure. My parents are at the Birthing Center and my new baby sister has just been rushed to the hospital on a streacher, after being alive no more than a few hours. The little kids don't know, only Moira and I . My Grandma is down the hall, I doubt she's asleep. My Dad is more troubled than I think I've ever seen him, when we're leaving to go over to Steve Dear's house to spent the night.
It's weird because everything seemed fine at first, but I had a really weird feeling. I just had a feeling something might go wrong. Then when I held her, I looked at her face, and I thought I noticed something. I tried to convince myself I was wrong and that the Doctors would have noticed and done something about it if there was anything wrong. However not to long after, my Dad is called by the Mid wife to go talk privately, and then I knew. A few minutes later he calls us all out into the hall minus the little kids and tells us Mary Evelyn is "not well." She may have heart problems and her breathing is weak and they think she has down syndrome. I guess I kind of knew. My Mom noticed her face too and thought she probobly did. None the less I think she's beautiful.
Moira's asking me a lot of questions when I don't really know anything. My Dad was very upset on the phone. He didn't know much of anything all he said was " Seeint them take that baby away on the strecher was just about all I could handle."
I tell Moira a little bit about down syndrome and as she keeps asking, I just tell her, All we can do is hope and pray.

TGIF!

2005-04-29T21:58:00.000-07:00

Well after an insanely LONG week, it's finally Friday. I had a super day if I do say so myself. I did however miss Melissa- since she's all the way in Pennsylvania without me! :-(. But to make up for it, I went out w/ Patrick, Sean and Heather. We hit up I heart NY Pizza and the "Jazz festival", and then Goodberrys, always a good combination. I also stopped by the LAX game in which we dominated! 10-1? I think that was it- and perhaps my favorite part of the nite, i got to ride in the red, BMW convertible, that belongs to Mr. Jason Huber. That' was intense. So I can't help but get really excited because in 5 days I get my braces off after 3 very long years, then I get to go to prom with Sean, and then I get to go to the lake! Holla. omg too ghetto? Anyway I'm sooo excited. Oh and we have conference. If anyone thinks running isn't fun- just try playing my newest running game- Sardines while running- it's amazing, almost as good as the Pinecone game... almost. well it's my bed time, i have to run too soon in the morning. Love, Bernadette

In English Class-

2005-04-28T09:44:00.000-07:00

So, It's Thursday, and yesterday definetly felt like Friday... this has been an insanely long week. My Mom had to go into the hospital on Wednesday morning because last Friday she had a "mini - stroke". At first they told us they were going to have to induce labor, even though she's not due to have the baby for 2 more weeks, but then they ran a million tests instead. Then they figured out after 2 days in the hospital she would be fine. She came home last night and my Grandma ( who is a saint- btw) made awesome eggplant parm. which is soo yummy. That was a big relief that she got to come home. Now I'm at school and should be doing my "works cited" but yeah I'm really not feeling like it .I gotta go though. More later. Peace, Bernadette

2005-04-23T20:01:00.000-07:00

well, i couldn't really think of a creative title for this one, oh well. It's a Saturday, and I know you're not supposed to brag about like doing good deeds or whatever, but wow, I was insanely good today. Here's my day:
6:00- wake up
6:30- leave my house and go watch an old man w/ alshimers for the whole morning, cook for him talk to him, hear the same stories over and over again.
12:00- leave his house
12:30- hang out with family
1:00- run for 1 hour and 20 minutes
3:00- go feed the homeless
4:00- come home eat call ppl
7:00- clean my room
8:00- clean up dinner
9:00- sit around with family

wow i'm not kidding my parents cannot complain about me... ever

Free Ben and Jerry's day!

2005-04-19T15:25:00.000-07:00

I had a really nice day today.
so maybe justine will make fun of me for this, but they elected a new pope today, which sorry i think it's a big deal I mean I am a Catholic, so yeah. A whole bunch of us skipped 8th period and watched on the big screen when it was announced. Then WRAL interviewed me! How awesome is that? Plus I had a pop-quiz last period which i heard about from other classes and I got to miss it! ha. Plus it was free ben & jerry's day so I got to go eat 2 cones with all my favorite people, Patty, Melissa, Kathryn, Heather, Emily, Mike- it was excellent oh and my whollle family, plus my 2 new cousins from Guatemala. Oh and I had RCHS prom on last Saturday! It was realllly fun. I have to go, but I have sooo much more to say. Peace, Bernadette

last day

2005-04-03T12:23:00.000-07:00

Hey-
So it's the last day of my Spring Break, after this it's a long ass time of going to school and getting no break, but I can deal. I just have to survive Mr. Ferris and Chemistry and I'll be alright. As for today I'm just going to Funwerks in Cary to drop off Moira, Veronica, and Timmy off at a birthday party and hopefully eating some pizza and then leaving. Kathryn might meet me. SB has been pretty good actually. I went and ate lunch at RCHS the other day which was pretty intense. I had so much fun. It was kind of like an Exploris reunion, odd. It was so good to see all my old friends. But I have to say it's a COMPLETE contrast from Gibbons. Plus I got to hang out with a lot of people who probobly usually get second best to Melissa, not that I do that on purpose, but sometimes I guess we get all "self-absorbed" as Scranton so nicely put it. Or oh wait, I meant MR. SCRANTON, since Pettigrew oops again MR. PETTIGREW says we have to have the MR. part. Wow I dislikee that man. But whatever I mean I guess getting a gold medal pays off big time in your life.
Let's see, Heather came over this week and we saw Ms. Congeniality 2, it was pretty good, pretty much what you'd expect from such a movie if you catch my drift. I might have alredy said this but I got my prom dress too. Brianna and I met in the Sams Club parking lot and she brought it to me since she was driving nearby. It's freaking goregous, I'm not kidding, I feel like I'm going to the Oscars when I wear it.
Sara and I had the most fun over break I think, Sara is by far one of the coolest people I think I've every encountered, and believe me I've encountered a lot of people in my life.
Well sorry this blog has no real value, and it's pretty boring, but Kaye has agreed to come over and help me pimp my blog, so hopefully it will improve. I gotta go now though.
Peace and pray for the Pope RIP- Bernadette

Good Friday... literally

2005-03-25T18:21:00.000-08:00

Hello Everyone!

Well today was a nice day, although I'm pretty much about to give up on my blog since no one ever reads it, apparently, because I even tried the shout out thing and got no comments- but whatever, I guess this is good for me to have anyway. To keep track of myself.
So it's spring break, it's ok I guess, except my Dad and I got in the BIGGEST fight ever 2 nights ago and he was just bitching me out for like 2 hours without stopping, for no reason. But I get my new car next week which is really sweet, and I get my prom dress on Tuesday! I walked in the pilgrimage today, Blake didn't show, big surprize there.ha ha But that was good I guess then I went to Raleigh Relays which was fun, cold but fun. Fredy ran really excellent. well i gg. mom's yelling. -Bernie

ALMOST THERE

2005-03-20T15:00:00.000-08:00

Hey!
So it's almost spring break- I have 2 more days of school. I can't wait, even thought it's not like I have any kick ass plans, I just need a break from school.
As for me, I'm at the Biesack's house right now. I just got back from a weekend at the SLC retreat, which I was kind of forced to go on and MISS COTILLION ... but it was pretty good anyway. We all went to the Anti-War rally in Fayetteville, which was AMAZING. Seriously it was so empowering to be there with all those other people who supported the troops but were against the war.
Tons of military families came and even soldiers who had been to Iraq and were against the war- that was intense to see. There were like 1,500 people there, it was awesome. I definetly saw Dr. Sprauge there too.
So it was a good weekend. Played my favortie 20 questions all the way home. :-)
Oh which reminds me of last weekends trip to NIC, it was really great. I didn't run well at all but I had so much fun. Driving the suburbans up was excellent and so was playing 20 questions lke non stop on that trip ha. MOre on that later I gg eat dinner.
Love,
Bernadette

horrible day

2005-03-08T20:04:00.000-08:00

Today was awful- i'm completely stressed out to the max because i won't be at school after 6th period on Thursday so I'm missing so much class and right at the end of the quarter missing class is a BITCH. ha ha awnyway i just have huge amounts of work and i shouldn't be on the computer right now, but hey i needed a break from straight studying for hours.
secondly i'm really sick of FAKE so many people are, i hate it so much when i think someone is my firned and it turns out they totally are not or they talk shit about me when i'm not there. when i have a problem with someone, i usually don't pretend to like them or talk to them all the time, but maybe that's just me.
i really hope NIC goes well, i bet it will and i bet i'll have fun, but i dunno that's just stressful too you know? soo yeah i dunno there's just a lotta shit going on with a few of my friends that i don't even feel like talking about.
i mean i just have to keep thinking things can always be worse, and i have friends who have my back that i'm SO thankful for- and a family who loves me, plus although my calves are about to fall off, i'm doing well at track so it's ok.
plus i'm not so sure about prom... i have no clue what i'm gonna do... whatever, i don't wanna think about it right now, too much on my mind as it is.
so anyway i'm gonna go get back to work, but that's today in a nutshell: sucked. goodnight, i love my friends so much, thank you. -Bernie

shout outs continued:

Jenny Logan: where the hell would i be without you? you're seriously so motivational and i mean that! you're so cute!

Jack- ok you asked for one so here you go- sucks that you live so far away, wish i got to see you more...

Ben- thank you so much for always making me feel better no matter what, you mean so much to me

Claire- you're an amazing runner believe that and sweet

Ashley Unruh - you have a beautiful voice and it's been nice to have you on the team this season

Mimi- YOU ROCK- chem would be death without you and you're an excellent listener.

lamest blog ever

2005-03-07T17:27:00.000-08:00

OK- so after looking at some other blogs, and hearing from Kaye a thousand times, i've decided my blog really sucks- so i'm trying to improve on it, soon when i have some time i'll try to add some pictures and other excting stuff, websites, i dunno, someone tell me how to make this cooler, than maybe people will read it...

Anyway, today was a really nice day. I came into it after an excellent weekend, thanks to sara, the people at autobell, the kochs and the warners, ha ha. sooo you know how when the weather is nice it almost makes everything better? well todays weather was freaking amazing, that's always really great. then i had two tests, ferris ( boooo) and english for sir/dad/ scranton ( my coach for those of you who don't know, might as well be my dad, same pretty much, heh heh) english i think i did well on, history, who knows, it's really whatever mr ferris decides, how he's feeling on the day he grades. oh well. i also found out i can't get into spanish 4 honors next year, which i'm sufficiently pissed about- damn it mrs kruell, i completely blame her, completely.
Anyway that's definetly enough about school- i'm so so so excited about NIC next weekend, melissa and i are in the winners circle so i mean we're definetly going, we won the races to see who gets to go. me the mile mel the half... yessssss. so anyway we get to get TONS of free stuff, and it's just all my best friends on a trip! i can't wait- like last year, i got suspended, which my parents and scranton remineded me about today, but it was still excellent. i kinda miss all my old xc ppl from last year, i got to see jenny today tho, jenny you're seriously like my hero, what a good captian.
anyway running is excellent, school is good, boys- we're getting there ha ha yeah xc girls we have the plan, frineds= amazing, family is great!
here's some shout outs:

melissa- i love you so much, i'd be NOWHERE without you, HLM naturally and winners circle

justine- omg we've become amazingly close this year and i love you so much jus! where would i be w/o you... alone at lunch!

jason- you're amazing, always have been always will be- i trust you insanely and i'm so blest to have you

lauren- why are you so perfect?

patrick- you're such a role model for me, no joke, i'd be a coke addict by now without you, ha ha jk but i really do look up to you buddy

heather- omg trista the paparattzi !

tommy- your mom's cool

david- oh my puppy you're the best

sean- even tho you're full of false promises it's cool, we're alright

kathryn- you're the best, i mean that, we are rising up.....

ok that's all i have time for, but i love all of you so much i'll do some more later!
ONE LOVE- Bernadette

PS: NEW CAR ON APRIL 1ST!!!! AHHHH

Running, family, life

2005-02-23T16:26:00.000-08:00

Well it's finally mid winter break, which is always a good time to just chill and catch up with people who i haven't seen in forvever. it's kind of amusing how things don't change at all sometimes.Ashley Murr nd I went out to dinner the other nite, and we're pretty much the same. I remember when we were like 8 and we played these lame games like try to make the other person laugh and we'd end up in complete hysterics no matter what, and well we almost always end up in hysterics no matter what. That's one thing I love about friends, no matter what happens, where you are, whatever the condtions they can always seem to make you feel better. Just so you all know I appriciate friends so much. Too bad I'm not hanging out with any now... oh wait my parents want me to be a hermit. I'm pretty convinvced of this fact actually. My Dad and I got in big fight like 2 days ago. He accused me of not caring about my family at all and all this other shit that's completely untrue, i think he honestly tries to piss me off sometimes. The main point of the fight was I should go out once every month and stay home cleaning and taking care of my sibs to show my true dedication to my family. Anyway, that kinda sucked, my break hasn't been bad by any streach tho. Saved is the funniest movie... I'm kinda in love with the gay guy in it, heh heh. I"M just so glad to not be at school, I"m getting like senioritis and I"m not even a senior. I seriously couldn't do any work the last week of school. Oh well. Hmm what else have I been doing? I think I write this just for myself, so i can figure out what's going on in my life i mean no one really reads it but that's ok... Well I won $105 dollars the other weekend in run for the roses. I got 3rd girl over all and sean and i won the couples race so we each got 50 for that. It was funny tho b/c when we went up to get our awards everytone thought we were together for real and was like awww. ha ha it made me laugh.ASo So I got to get some new shoes. and i'm already like stocking up on clothes for nexet year when i'm done wearing white polos. so i've done a lotta shopping. I wrote a letter to the editor yesterday about how CAFTA which the Bush administration is supporting is an idiotic idea, althought I didn't put it in those words. Well i'm gonna go. Thanks to all my friends, you keep me sane. ha love, bernadette

Mundane week=over!

2005-02-05T01:11:00.000-08:00

so this week was pretty cool, oh wait minus the whole pretty cool part. it was really regular, which is not so much fun. not to mentinon i had a ton of work. but now it's friday and i'm happy so yeah.

so what's up w/ me....
well as some of you may have heard, i've been super excited for prom and have my dress and such, but i figured out w/ the help of many, a little too excited, (who'd have known?!?!) so i'm not talking about it again until ike march.

i'm super excited about next weekend, i'm either going to the beach, going to see jason perform, orrr going to the game. yeah excellent
and well this weekend= family time, lots of peace stuff, the norm
justine i love you!! everyone just so you know, justine thompson is the best most wonderful friend i've ever had!

hmmm VA tech= didn't run at it
welll that's me as of now i suppose, iknow not interesting but too bad! ha ha
peace, bernie

hmm... life

2005-01-22T13:59:00.000-08:00

As usual it's been forever since I've written anything on this- so here goes. Well today's a Saturday where I have nothing to do, so I've just been chillin, talked to Jason, cleaned my room, i'm putting off doing my homeowrk. I ran this moring 8 freaking miles actually and then had a caramel machiatto, yay. ha ha this might sound bad but this is SOOOO BORING for whoever's reading this. wow. my life actually is pretty interesting. lately i've been kinda obsessing over prom, which so have mel and jus soo it's not just me, but yeah i figured out today i have to stop, no more talking about prom until at least.... the end of march, end of story, there i'm done.
oh right so christmas, was fun as usual. it was nice to be with family and friends. we went and visited brianna two days after xmas, and it snowed the day after, which was alright. luckily everything is going well w/ the fam now! i'm so glad we're not fighting. uh oh speaking of that my mom's screaming i might have to go sooon. geeeze. my dad's outta town and my mom's pregnant so things are a little crazy for the next week while dad's gone. he's in Kentucky rite now and then he's going to Georgia for his trial for hitting a cop.. ha ha he didn't really , but yeah ti's a long story. ok well i'm tired of this. more later. bottom line: everything's good now. ( oh and i have a 4.0!)
peace, bernadette
ps. join SURGE, coming soon to CGHS

ok so i'm babysitting

2004-12-10T18:29:00.000-08:00

yeah i'm over babysitting for kids who go to my church making money to buy all my x-mas gifts.
i was just thinking well actually i've been thinking about this, and maybe it sounds really lame, but i'm feeling really rebellious. like i'm getting really sick of being a good kid. i was thinking and isn't like high school your time to kind of do whatever the hell you want so that when you're old you won't have to. i want to start doing more stuff, and stop worrying about my parents and consequences so much. ha ha i realize this sounds really really stupid, but it's the truth.
anyway, i don't know if i ever wrote that we won states. yep, cghs girls team are the state champs! i had a really good race then too, i came in 4th and ran 19:20 even though my time should be way faster. i have more to say but i'm gonna try and find a pic of myself somewhere so that i can have one on my stupid profile. -bernie-

oh my goodness

2004-12-10T17:54:00.000-08:00

wow, so it's been a really really long time since i last wrote anything in here. i guess i have a few dumb excuses for that. 1) I have no time in my life at all anymore 2) i'm hesitent to actually write what's going through my mind in here in case the wrong person reads it. 3) i don't think anyone really reads this anyway.
ok so uhh my life as of now...
well let me start out by saying boys really suck, really they do. it's been so depressing to me lately that no boys like me. especially seeing as melissa and justine both have bf's. grrr. i mean i completely understand, but they talk about them all the time, i would too if i had one. anyway it kind of makes me wonder, as pathetic as this sounds, what i'm doing wrong, because i mean i can't really see anything that unattractive about myself. ok i'm not goregeous but i'm not ugly i don't think. unless i'm one of those ppl who just is really ugly and has no idea... man that would suck. anyway, i know all that sounds really shallow or whatever but it's honestly what i think about a lot.

hmm what else, well this week was my first full week of school in like FOREVER, and i think my grades are screwed because of it. i had a 3.9 last quarter, which is my highest gpa ever. maybe it doesn't sound that good to you, but i was so damn proud of it. i'll probobly have like 2.0 this quarter. sucks. i speant all this week making up work from last week and next week i have exams which i'm totally not ready for at all! ahhh. oh well, it'll pass. oh so i was out because i had "sinusitis" aka a sinus infection, but that shit was AWFUL. geez, i was seriously in bed unable to do anything for like 10 days and felt sooo bad. :-(
anyway i'm still kinda getting over it, my nose is crazy runny, and it sucks. i had to blow my nose in algebra yesterday and everyone was like " oh gross, sick" etc, and it was embarrising. oh and we had mass at school and i had to leave in the middle, to blow my nose, walking down the belachers in front of everyone! gahhhh. being sick is soo bad.
oh well whatever. also i had to run footlocker while iwas sick! and i ran my worst time in years, and cried like a physco. plus scranton was not very forgiving. we fought. i've been fightin w/ ppl a lot lately, that can't be good. i fought with my dad like all this week, wednesday iwas soo pissed at him i can't even put it in words. we're straight now, but this was a pretty bad week.hmm so let's see how this comes out and later when i'm bored i'll write more. -Bernadette-

2004-09-19T13:37:00.000-07:00

oh and i saw alex and ben today and it made me way happy!!!!

2004-09-19T13:28:00.000-07:00

what a beautiful day it is outside.... i just finished working on the paper, and all three of my pages are all layed out. so i'm done, i kinda want to go see melissa on the way home. mrs. billman's pregnant and that's cute. hmmm what else, well i just had a milkshake and i'm the most relaxed i've been in a while. hmm had an xc meet yesterday and we're still undefeated. also i only have a B in algebra when it was a "D" the other day so it's all ok. hmmmm has anyone ever lied to you and then they do somethign to you and deny it and you don't know if you can believe them or not, well yea it's bothering me a lot... my family is good for once, no fighting and drama and such.school's alright too i guess, and so is running and newspaper, just really busy. but then again i have this theory that ppl are only as busy as we make ourselves... if that makes any sense. k well i'm gonna leave sschool now and i wanna go home. *muah* bernadette

it's been a while hasn't it?

2004-09-11T17:59:00.000-07:00

Hello!
I'm so happy to be wrting in my blog! Sorry to anyone who reads this that I seldom update it but with my life right now that ought to be understandable... Let's see I've now been up for 15 hours straight, and in those 15 hours I have
1. almost been arrested for a hit and run
2. set the course record for the 5 stage relays
3. Driven from Raleigh to Greensboro and back
4. Walked in a pumpkin field w/ my family
5. gone to waffle house with the coolest people I know, aka Melissa, Jenny Logan, Amanda Sampson, and Emily Adams... wow waffle house is sooo ghetto sometimes. heh heh

Anyway I've just been insanely busy since school started I'm news editor of my school paper, so that holds sooo many responsiblities, and then I'm in 3 honors classes plus running sooo much milage ( like 50 miles this week), and being team captian which yeah i got soo angry today at everyone for not listening to me when I was just trying to do like Nick said and get everyone cooled down and ppl would not stop bitching at me or just not listending at all. i guess that's wahat happends when you have so many girls on one team, it's annoying though, and i yelled at people a lot to the point where some people probobly think I'm a total bitch but whatever. I was mad at my time in the race today... I ran 9:37, which was faster than last year, but way slower than Heather's 8:31 and I was not that far away from Heather in Hendersonville, so I shouldn't be that far behind her now. I think it was just hard running all alone with no one to push me and running a shorter distance than usual... I should have gone harder bottom line. Oh but Nick from UNC aka used to go to Weslyan you made my day! Thanks so much for cheering for me and such.
Hmm and then there was my accident, so I was trying to parralell park in downtown raleigh and I bump into the bumper of this HUGE truck in front of me and leave a little red paint from my car on teh bumper, my car on the other hand has a huge dent in the hood and the hood can't open, to make a long story short I freaked out and started crying the owner wasn't there I went and got my mom trying to figure out what to do and she says don't worry about it there's not damage that will come off with soap and water... well I go home and about 20 minutes later a cop shows up at my door and was merciful and didn't arrest me , but he made it clear that I was lucky I got him as a cop and not some jerk b/c basically I could have been charged witha hit and run which would have been beyond belief horrible. But I kind of haave to ask why didn't my mom tell me to leave a note w/ my info on itthis has never happened to me before was I just supposed to know to do that??! oh and this lady reported me to teh poilce! yeah taht's right I was reported... stupid bitch. heh heh anyway that was crazy. as is life right now
also not to sound insanely lame but it's kind of stressing me out that i don't have a bf..... I just want someone to settle down w/ I"m sick of just doing stuff w/ ppl and it not meaning anything. So, I dunno just thought I'd say that to get it out and not have to think about it. There's much much much more I could say but I don't have the time to sit here typing so I won't. I love all of you! -Bernadette-

at ellen & laura's hiz-ouse

2004-08-02T18:21:00.000-07:00

wut up.... i'm at laura and ellen's right now b/c we're having our "reunion" w/ the yonkes who i haven't seen in sooo long. let's see, what've i been up to... well cfl and camp for the past 2 weeks. let me just say both= sooooo much fun. john and alice are the coolest even tho i haven't seen them in like 5 years, so i thought it would be awkward. anyway, cfl, seamus you are the best, doug you're so funny... ummm camp cypress bay i love you guys.... kev,lee,doran,billy you guys are great. well i gg so much more i could say. peace, bernadette

at brevard! yeaaa!

2004-07-28T09:19:00.000-07:00

hey ya'll i'm at the brevard libraray right now.... yeah, camp is awesome... i really miss all my east chapel hill guys from last year tho, there aren't too many good looking guys here. however let me just call it right now, we will have such a good team next year! geez, justine is awesome and has stepped it up soo much. Plus I love her to death. also melissa & k tune you know all ma homies... hahaha anyway what else have i been up to? well i went to the beach w/ k tune last week and we had a blast, oh and nick and fredy snuck into our dorms last night we also had some insane dance parties, group showers, and of course, spoon fests, haha yeah lauren i think you know what i mean. anyway, it's been great, oh and let me just say.... SEE FARENHEIGHT 911! ... it's so good, and makes such a good case against war.
oh and can i just say also ppl who think they can get any girl they want and they are really big ass holes who just use you, yeah umm good luck in life. here's a song to sign me off before i talk some more.

is that what you call a getaway?
tell me what you got away with
because i've seen more spine on a jelly fish
and i've seen more guts on 11 year old kids

^ yeah just remember that...

ok well peace guys i gg check up on my girlies.... oh and amanda we miss you at camp girl! ha ha
~bernadette

b to the izzle

2004-07-11T19:57:00.000-07:00

hello hello,
well i just got in from seeing "Anchorman" with walt and his dad... i thought it was really good, plus walt works at the theather so i got in free..yay! i'm bummed i can't make it to practice tomorrow, too bad i'm supposed to be running 54 miles this week, yeah that's right 54 miles! ha ha even the NC State girls said that was a lot of mileage. I dunno how I feel about doing high mileage, i mean on the one hand we have high goals that we wanna reach as a team and individually so I mean I wanna do what it takes, but on the other hand, 1. how much is too much.. eg. overtraining...shin splints you know 2. running like 10 mile runs by yourself sucks balls. oh well i'll quit complaining. i went over to justine's last night for her "not a birthday party/hangout" which i mean i guess was pretty cool. things got pretty hectic, michael thompson cracks me up though, i never knew he was so crazy. and i really liked giving melissa and justine their birthday presents. ha ha my card cracked me up. sara riggs you're the best girlie! and so are you melissa, it was so good to get to hang out, after soo long. ha ha ok well i guess i'm gonna go to sleep or something since i went to bed at like 5 am this morning and then had to wake up for church.... nite!

booooorrrreeeeddd

2004-07-09T09:28:00.000-07:00

wow so i'm at work and 8 hours a day in one house w/ three little kids is not so fun....

I'M BAAACCCCCKKKK

2004-07-07T08:48:00.000-07:00

HEY! Wow, I missed my blog! So, I just got back about a week ago from my delegation to Nicaragua! Let me just say, it was incredible. I can't even begin to describe everything that happened. First of all let me just say, Nicaragua is the most beautiful place, the scenery is amazing, the people are welcoming and kind, and it's sad that they have so many problems. Also the people I went with were awesome... I love everyone on my delegation!
There are a few main problems in Nicaragua, the debt they can never pay off, the IMF and WTO's "structural adjustment programs", & the immense poverty. Nicaragua seriously is in the middle of an economic war. It's sad that country's like the US spend billions of dollars on war and weapons that kill when Nicaraguan people can't afford the necessities to live.
Anyway, it was an experience I will never ever forget... More on it later I suppose.
It's nice to be home, but I kind of miss all my friends... Although Sara I had fun yesterday. :-)
Hmmm, so now that I'm back, here's my life as of now, running, working ( which I'm doing right now), hanging out. I would like to say that I was invited to go to the beach, Hershey Park, Ohio twice, but I had to say no to a lot of those options.... Boo hoo
Alright and now for the random shallow part about my Nicaraguan trip.... I SAW JA RULE at the airport, and got a picture with him... YAY... haha

alright that's all for now, because I should be checking on the kids I'm babysitting.... haha, oh and Harry potter 3... What a good movie, and I'm dying to see farinheight 911! Peace, Bernadette

At ariel's house

2004-06-12T16:20:00.000-07:00

Hey hey hey,
I'm at ariels house right now, for her graduation par-tay. moira and ariel and ellen headed out to the pool but laura and i weren't really in swimming moods sooo uh we're in here. yeah kinda bored..

deep stuff

2004-06-10T19:46:00.000-07:00

Two nights ago I went to a memorial for Don Clark Pearson, and it was a good experiance. Don was the cross country coach at East Chapel Hill high school, and went to Chapel Hill high school when he was younger. My Dad used to write about him in the Chapel Hill News. Don commited sucicide last summer. So, 2 days ago would have been Don's birthday, so we celebrated, had cake and told stories about Don. Now, as corny as it may sound it made me realize that life is short and you never relize when you are going to lose someone.
Also I was thinking about seeing as life is short, I should write about things that are more meaningful... If something were ever to happen to me and you were to read my journals,. you would find worthless shit about like guys I had crushes on in the 6th grade. Where as I want to let everyone know how much they mean to me, and about my life.
So, I"m gonna publish this and write the rest later because I already wrote everything out and it was erased when the computer messed up. :-( ok well peace, bernadette

meh, first day of summer.... I guess

2004-06-07T17:06:00.000-07:00

It's the first day of summer I suppose. I mean it's the first Monday that we're not at school. Yay! My day was rather uneventful though. I went to practice this morning, and wow we had 17 girls show up, which is insane! That's so many girls. Plus we have these kind of new coaches like Joe, and Nick Mangum. We did out and back course just on the main road, which was alright. I actually kind of like the little sophomores who joined our team. They're alright.

Let's see so I get back from practice, and my Dad is like let's get mad at Bernadette for everything she's ever done! I dunno like he just all of the sudden started yelling at me. Eventually I just started crying, and then he was like I guess I'm sorry, or whatever. So, I dunno... that sucked. He says that I don't appriciate him. Which I don't think he understands just how much I do for him. Like, let's think, why am I a runner? Oh yeah that's right because of my Dad. Why am I doing the newspaper? Oh that's right, because of my Dad. Why do I call my parents constantly whenever I spend the night with people, oh yeah to make them happy. And, why do I like never do crazy shit, oh yeah because of my parents. Oh well I'm over it. i gg peace, bernadette

in earth science again

2004-06-04T06:40:00.000-07:00

sweet that exam just dominated me.... and i'm so pissed that i still have a "C" in spanish, even though i studied my ass of for the exam and got an 88 on it. yeah, that's awesome. I've made straight A's in spanish my whole life and all of the sudden i have a "C"... that rocks.
wow, bernadette's life seems really interesting...not....
um, me and bernadette def just failed our earth science exam ( megan)
anyway i guess i'm out, gotta study for english so that i don't fail that too.

peace, bernadette

More exams...

2004-06-02T11:23:00.000-07:00

Ok so 2 more days, nothing I can't handle. Spanish exam was alright too actually, I suppose all this studying is actually paying off. Oh and just a note to everyone at my lunch table from this year, I love all of you, each one. Even if I was mean sometimes, or add, or annoyed you to death with my talking I still love you all. I really hope we have a good lunch again next year like we had this one.
you know looking back on this year, it really has been a good one. Melissa and I were talking ( how unusual) and we were just saying how we've really accomplished everything we wanted to accomplish this year. I mean it all started back with Operation Orange, which some of you might remember, and then there was the ever changing thousands of OPP's after that. Although some of them did work, and are kind of still going on. Plus we won states for the first time ever, and I became editor for next year, and mastered the guitar. Plus I think I really figured out who my friends are this year, and I'm so happy about that. The people I've surrounded myself with this year, have been amazing. I don't know what I would have done without all my friends.
Lunch at IHOP rocked my life! ha ha Everyone the waitress at the IHOP on Capital Blvd. Is sooo nice, yay free sundaes! I'm gonna miss everyone this summer, and we have to get together and just do lunch like we did today, if not more. Peace b/c I've gotta study! Love, Bernadette

3 more days

2004-06-01T12:21:00.000-07:00

sooo 2 hardest exams are over.. thank God! curtis's theo exam wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. if you studied you'll be fine. geometry was alright too i think. i was proud of myself on my mid-term for geo.. yay A! and i beat certain really smart ppl in my class. geo what a great class, i'm gonna miss all you add mother fuckers. ha ha not it was really good tho. speaking of ppl in goe.. brian i love your hair! i think i wanna cut mine, although not buzzed like brian's. tomorrow i have spanish w/ krull.. omg, i think i'll be fine as long as i study, but i'm procrastinating on that one at the moment. i'll probably go do it in a few.
omg i'm so glad it's almost summer tho! my summer is going to rock! i can't believe i leave for nicaragua in like 2 weeks. i'm soooo excited. it should be amazing.
oh man and sorry i have to brag about myself real quick, i'd just like to say.. most valuable reporter, news editor for next year! yay! and also all conference in the mile, conference champion for the 2, all state for the 2- mile, 5th for the mile! 11:35 for the 2, 5:25 for the mile. holla! oh and some guitar award, that i'm pretty sure everyone got haha. still it's an award. ha ok well i better go study. bye! wish me luck...

you rock my life... ass hole

2004-06-01T12:07:00.000-07:00

so let me just say leaving anonymous comments is pretty cool.... not! like if you're going to make a comment at least have the gut to say who left it.. coward.

in earth science class!

2004-05-28T10:59:00.000-07:00

hey ya'll! i'm in earth science and we have a free period so yeah.... michael & megan were over here with me but then they left b/c i was still typing the stupid shit that didn't publish before! grrr. well i'd just like to say i'm so glad all my drama is over with from like the past few days... ha ha i'm sure some of you had to hear all about it and well i'm sorry. well class' bout over so i gotta bounce yo. ha
peace, bernadette

2004-05-28T10:58:00.000-07:00

ok well i just typed like a ton of shit and well it didn't work i'm in earth science right now thogh. anyways let me see if this one will work.

2004-05-22T18:30:00.000-07:00

hey! well i kinda forgot i had a blog for a while. life's kinda been a blur over the past few days... congrats to EVERYONE at saint mary's who got confirmed! that was really fun to just see all of you. i wish i'd been up there with you tho. leah congrats on your jewish confirmation too! hah that was soo much fun! ok for those of you who weren't there tho... there were these ppl in front of us in the temple i might add, MAKING OUT! the whole time. and not like teenagers, like fat old ugly ppl! it was soooo wierd. i mean during a service. it would be the equivalent of me making out w/ someone during mass ! it pissed me off actually. haa
well i have so much more to say
but i gg
peace

blah blah

2004-05-18T15:58:00.000-07:00

well hello hello everyone! today was lot's of fun for me. although rather uneventful.... sort of. school as usual, running, as usual. well not quite as usual, i ran at home today since track is over... and oh wait i'm still running! oh yeah and i forgot tho... i have a C in curtis' class! is that not crazy, too bad i'm like awesome in his class but ok let's give me a "C"! haha oh well. i'm kinda giving up on this whole school thing. it's getting old. oh man and guitar concert tomorrow! dont forget, come watch me 3rd period, tell you teacher to take the whole class! ok well i gg eat sum dinner. peace~bernadette

2004-05-17T14:23:00.000-07:00

well today was just normal pretty much, except it's so hard to believe track's over! i was so lost after school today. actually justine and i had a fun time though. ha ha she and i and ryan started the " ckwgdttgsawiatabs" club. and for all you non members... that is the "cool kids who walk down to the gas station and walk in a triangle and buy slushies" club. yeah it's just that awesome. then justine and i thought it would be a good idea to hop in the back of mark's truck and not tell him we were in there, which in case you're wondering.... really scary thing to do! too bad i really think they knew we were in there all along though. anyways, they drove like insanely and scared the shit outta me, but it was all in good fun.
sooo too bad i'm about to go running even though tracks over, but it's all good. i get to go swimming anyways. yess! ok well bye guys. peace

fun stuff

2004-05-16T18:53:00.000-07:00

well today was a pretty good day... (i can't help but think to myself dude why does anyone care about how well my day went...) haha
oh well i enjoy writing it. i just got back not too long ago from jenny's house, b/c we had our end of the year track party! pretty much everyone came, including ryan cav! which was so fun b/c i mean he doesn't even run track! we got to hang out which i mean is always a fun time. then i ate like 1000 taco thingys, which were really good.
it was kinda bittersweet tho, b/c i don't know what i'm gonna do w/o jenny and all the seniors next year. it'll be so different. but it's cool tho chris williams is gonna join and so is ryan cav, seriously.... football? anyway, that was fun.
ok and on an entirely different note, i have to get something off my chest. what's going on in iraq is sick, and our country is seriously screwed up sometimes. we have to work to stop all the violence and craziness people! i was getting so mad in world history the other day, because some people are just so uneducated, and so unaware about what's going on. i mean we bombed a hospital, we are killing innocent people non-stop. we're an imperialist nation, it's sad. anyway, that's my 2 cents.
i gotta go do my earth science homework from last friday so i'm out. i love you all a ton! peace, bernie

more on my perfect day

2004-05-15T18:43:00.000-07:00

well anyway you're probably getting bored of reading this by now, but i've just got a lot on my mind that i need to let out. so as i was saying we won states, and my dad was like wow bernadette you didn't race... but then a few minutes ago i was talking about how i ran like complete shit and he was like "coming in 5th in the state isn't bad bernadette" so i guess he's over it.... i mean i did run really well yesterday so, i suppose he's proud about that. anyway winning states was absolutely amazing... the last race, the 4x4 decided whether we win or lost states to FORSYTH the insanely good team.... and well we won in an absolutely amazing race. i'm never gonna forget jenny just crying tears of joy as we finished, so overwhelmed.... and everyone just screaming insanely. as emily said "it's an amazing feeling bernadette!" and well brianna came and saw everyone for the first time since xmas when my dad and her got in a huge fight, so i couldn't be happier. *sigh* well i hafta go shower i'm disgusting, and really really really sunburned. i love you all!

just another perfect day...

2004-05-15T18:25:00.000-07:00

Oh my gosh! i'm so excited i actually have a blog now! i feel like a raleigh charter person.... anyway today was an amazing day. first of all we had our state track meet today and yesterday. it was amazing. just let me say i LOVE all you people on track, and i'm so proud of everyone. our girls team won states for the first time ever in gibbons history, which gibbons has been around a LONG time. anyways, my coach said i scored 10 percent of the team's points.. so that's really exciting. i ran my fastest times ever. in the 2 mile i came in 3rd in the whole state, and i ran it in 11:35. and then i ran the mile today which SUCKED. i dunno what my time was but i really don't wanna know. i came in 5th in the state. my dad's words were "bernadette you had it right there in your fucking hands and you just didn't race." which i mean was true, i could have come in 2nd in the state if i'd run hard. oh well it's over now i suppose. well i have more to say but mom calls so i'll post another in a min or so. love you all sooo much! peace